My best friend and the love of my heart and soul, Barbara, recently joined Deviant Art, and she has uploaded a ton of poetry and her and I would both really appreciate it if you guys would stop by and browse through her work. She really enjoys quality critiques, and wants very badly to be able to improve her work wherever she can.

Her'es the link, and thanks everybody! [link]

Sorry this took so long, my darling. As you know I've been having a lot of anxiety and paranoia issues lately and I've been trying really hard just to sit still until they pass by. Reading poetry filled with strong emotions didn't seem like a good idea when I wasn't entirely concious because of the St. John's Wort I've been taking to calm myself down.

I am happy. Halloween is coming up, and so is my birthday!

I'd normally feel wierd about getting older but for some reason I care less and less as the day draws closer.

School's been going well, a couple classes I need to work harder on,but it'll all work out well in the end.

I haven't been on DA much lately, and have hardly uploaded anything since the semester started, but I do have a couple things I want to upload from my Design I course.

At any rate, I figured I needed a new journal entry, so this is here to hold up that space.

And while I'm at it, I might as well promote the following piece that I found today and really really like:

[link]

Welp, the fall semester starts for us John Tyler people on the 25th, and I'd really like to get a nice drawing in before that happens (among other things).

So I'm going to be spending a lot of time the next couple days working on something. Still haven't decided exactly what to draw, but I'll likely have done so in the next 45 minutes.

I'm also planning on putting together a couple sketch dumps from all the things I doodled in class last semester. Trust me, there's a few things i'm sure someone will find interesting/amusing.

And as always, the A Tale of Redwall project is still being worked on steadily. I'm adding a lot of enhancements to the conversation objects, allowing them to be activated when the player is within a specified range, giving them the ability to reposition or modify the range of eachother and all sort of other stuff. Now that i have the majority of the program design written already i'm just going through and adding little things lik this that'll add more dynamics for cutscenes and stuff.

Still have no idea when the official video 28 will be ready to be put together. There's a lot I want to be able to show in it and right now I haven't written all the little controls and triggers I'll need, muc less written all the animations required for the characters. But you can all rest assured that it's going to be awesome when it does come out!

This is just a little something I posted on my myspace recently for the 12 sad people who are on my friends list, lol. And don't worry guys, I only use myspace actively for about 5 minutes a week.

Anyhoo, this was a bit of a rant aboutwhat I want life to be like in 5-10 years, though I wish it could be sooner... heck, if I had to work and wait for a hundred thousand years, it'd be more than worth it.

"Perhaps if the 100+ friends I used to have on myspace could have read this a few may have removed themselves from my friends' list by themselves... then again, probably not.

I want to marry a woman who wants to be a mother.

I want my furture children to know that I love them and that as their parents, my wife and I value them so much that we would give our own lives to protect them.

I wan them to be able to know that they are not a "burden", they will be the greatest gift God could ever give to me and her, and that we hoped and prayed that the day would come when they would be a part of our lives.

I want them to have a mother who wants to spend time with them, to raise them as responsible and rational adults, and I want her to let them know that I love them even when I am not able to spend every waking moment with my family because of work or any future education I may pursue in the future.

I want to be able to provide for her and to ensure that she is comfortable.

I want to be able to give her a break and to be able to take care of the kids when she needs some time by herself or with her friends.

I want her to have friends.

I want her to know that she can rely on me, and that I will always be there for her.

I want to be respected and loved for who I am.

I want someone who can forgive my mistakes when I fall short, and will always want to move forward and put everything she has and is into creating the most beautiful and peaceful family that we can.

I want her to be supportive, dedicated, faithful and I want her to have full faith in me.

I want her to be patient with me and to help me to see what she does when I am blinded by anything.

I want her to know where we came from, who we are and where we can both go together.

I want her to dream the biggest dreams she can and ask me to help her make them real.

I want her to believe enough to put her best foot forward, dive into the pool and never look back.

I want her to never give up on me, our relationship, or our family, because nothing could ever matter to me more than her, our marriage, and our children.

I want to be a father.

I want to help to raise and nurture a loving and understanding family.

I want my children to know by my example that the measure of a man or woman is not what they get out of life, but what they put into it; that material wealth is neither happiness nor success.

I want them to know that in giving up the tangible things I may have had, the popularity i may have achieved, or the power I may have wielded; in giving all that up for them they could see that they are my happiness and my success.

I want to be patient enough to try to understand both my wife and children whenever we may disagree, no matter how big or small, and I want to have the humility to admit that I am wrong when I find that I am.

I want to be open and honest, because secrets shouldn't need to be kept.

I want to plan and prepare for the worst and hope for the best.

I want my family to live in a nice house in a quiet neighborhood with trees and grass.

I want my family to be able to enjoy life and smile uncontrollably everyday.

I want to be a great person, who will really make a difference in this world.

I want to show people a better way of living every day of my life.

I want to improve the world, to keep it from sinking any farther than it already has.

I want to create a place where peace and safety can be felt by all who enter...

And I want to start in the walls of my own home.

I want to be able to accept that I am not perfect, and to not let the stains of the past deter me from what good I may do in the future.

I want to always remember that no one has more control over my destiny than I do.

And I want everyone who thinks I'm crazy, stupid, or foolish, in wanting these things over the wealth, celebrations, and lusts of the world, to know that I never want them to speak to me again.

I want them to know that I don't need them to try to hold me back because I will only end up destroying any plans they may have to change me.

I want them to know that if they cannot understand, respect, or support my ideology then there is no reason in continuing any sort of so called "friendship" because without understanding and respect they can never be a true friend to me."


...And now a random note. Any of you who own a Wii and want to feel better physically, seriously, try Wii Fit. It'll make you life a lot better if you keep playig after the first month of uber fun-ness has worn off. Feeling better, relaxing better, sleeping better, and also feeling better about the way you look.

It's a Wii-win situation!

and another random note... why isn't the mood setter-er thing working!? I've been hopeless for too long! GACK!

...and I didn't mea W.O.W., lol. I meant, like, "Wow!"

I got Daily Deviated, over commented, and over 'd...

And three hours of boredom and relaxation got me about 1000 page views... This is crazy. And what's more crazy, the counts still rizing. My window keeps clicking every minute or so to let me know I've recieved another *something.

Well, I have to get back to homework if I'm ever going to work on the game tonight. Thanks once again to all of you who commented, :fav:'d, and especially you *crula for recommending me to a mod. ... in spite of how awqward me hugging you might be, lol.